Scared to feel

I stopped responding when my heart started speaking
I stopped trying to find the true definition of love when I actually felt I had my own meaning            Didn't try to explain it, cause its those eccentric feelings that you're scared to put into words
Cause it might be, lo..
Then I found myself not texting
Cause I started looking forward to your message
Cause when you start expecting, there's a huge risk
And it's then you allow yourself to be disappointed
Peculiar I think they call it
Noticing your unusual behavior doing things you don't do often
I thought I ran out of words for you until I realized there were other words I'd rather say
So speechless is what I became
Why I shut down when I feel the unnorm way
Maybe cause I'm not use to being in that place or
Maybe because I've never sincerely been
Feeling vulnerable I've never been fond of that feeling
Scared to feel, because hearts take the longest to heal
& I'm not positive I ready for that whole ordeal
But you can't help when you meet people & fall for them that's apart of living it's just scary
Because hearts have no boundaries are limitations when it starts feeling & that scares me..

TiffJ